8 Tips on How to Eliminate Children's Hesitation

  

8 Tips on How to Eliminate Children's Hesitation

Parents have always sought different ways to help their children develop good habits and eliminate bad ones, and eliminating hesitation in children is no exception. That's why here are 8 tips on how to eliminate children's hesitation from experts around the world, who have tested these methods in real life conditions. Although you can try them all at once, it's recommended to start with one tip at a time in order to track the results and determine what works best for your child. Remember that patience and consistency are the main factors that determine how successful you will be in your endeavor to eliminate children's hesitation in various situations you will encounter over time.

1) Talk about it

When speaking with your children, use easy words to explain what you are doing. Instead of trying to lecture them about why it is important not to do a certain thing, talk about how you feel when they do that thing and why it makes you feel that way. This way your child will be more likely to understand that there are consequences for their actions, rather than listening to a lecture from mom or dad. Ask questions: Asking your child questions is a great way for them to speak freely about whatever issue is bothering them or making them hesitant. When one conversation doesn't work, try another one at another time in order for them to understand why these things matter so much.

2) Communicate your intentions

Clearly communicate your intentions and follow through. Make sure your children know that you are there for them and will do everything you can to help them succeed. If they want a glass of water or need help with their homework, set a good example by responding in a matter-of-fact manner so they know they can come to you when they need something. The more responsive and helpful you are, the more likely it is that your children will learn how to respond confidently to difficult situations as well. Just make sure that every time you offer advice or support, you make it clear that it’s their decision whether or not they take it.

3) Build trust

The first thing parents need to do when trying to eliminate hesitation is establish trust. A child is hesitant because he doesn't feel safe, and you're his parent; if you want him to feel safe with you, you'll have to take every opportunity possible—big or small—to earn his trust. For example, even something as simple as holding his hand while walking down stairs can help build that sense of safety and make it easier for him in other situations. You can also use consequences: ask for a specific behavior and reward or punish that behavior accordingly. When it comes time for him or her to step out of her comfort zone, she'll be much more likely embrace new opportunities if she already knows what your response will be.

4) Make space in time and place

Although you can use almost any surface for finger-painting, including your child’s lap, we strongly recommend using a table where your child is seated in a high chair or standing at an easel. For parents, having them close and at a safe distance from sharp objects can be helpful as well. If your child is fidgety when it comes to sitting still, you may want to consider doing finger-painting outside—just be sure it’s warm enough! Be prepared: You will need washable paints (Crayola offers a good selection), paper towels or plain ole’ newspaper (for easy clean up later), brushes of varying sizes, water cups and sponges.

5) Decide together with your child

Some children might be quite resistant or hesitant to trying out a new sport or activity. Try talking it over with your child and come up with a solution together. What is your child afraid of? Is he worried about other kids teasing him for not being able to play well? What do you think will make him feel better about joining a team? For example, try telling him that practice makes perfect; he’ll start feeling more confident as he gets better at playing. Also, you can tell him that his teammates are sure to be supportive of each other; they’ll understand how hard it is learning something new.

6) Break the tasks into steps

You don’t have to tackle everything at once. Try breaking down tasks into smaller steps and completing them one by one. This makes goals seem more manageable, especially for children. By starting with a concrete step and finishing that first, your child will feel encouraged and motivated as they continue through their task list. When you focus on completion of small tasks, you help build your child’s confidence in his or her ability to complete larger ones in future.

7) Show them what you need from them

When trying to help a child overcome hesitations, have them run through a scenario with you. Ask them what they are afraid of. Find out what their worries are. Once you know their fears, try to make it easier for them. Help eliminate these issues before they can begin. For example, if your child is worried about falling off of a bike, give him or her extra support with training wheels while they practice riding. When they feel more comfortable on two wheels without any assistance, then you can take away those safety nets without fear that they will fall down as a result. Remember, be patient and don't push too hard or too fast when working with children; push at their own pace rather than yours.

8) Praise and rewards

According to a study published in The Journal of Social Psychology, children who have been praised for their drawings seem more hesitant and unsure when asked later to draw again. Praise and reward tend to cause children to doubt their own abilities, which makes them hold back and hesitate. Instead of praising or rewarding a child for an accomplishment, focus on actions you want repeated. Tell him that you like how he stood still long enough for his mommy or daddy to finish his drawing (for example). This way, he will continue doing whatever earned that praise—standing still—and also realize that it was okay with you if he didn't finish his picture. You're telling him not only what is desirable behavior but why it’s desirable.