Why Do We Lose Commitment

 

Why Do We Lose Commitment? 

We all want to stay committed, but it’s never an easy thing to do. There are many reasons why we lose commitment, and it’s important to know what they are in order to learn how to avoid them, or at least prepare yourself ahead of time. Here are some of the most common reasons people lose commitment, along with advice on how you can keep yourself from making these mistakes as well. You’ll be glad you read this article if you’re committed to staying committed!

Our Beliefs are Influenced by Social Proof

Many of our beliefs are influenced by what we think other people believe. For example, if most people believe that global warming is a myth, it becomes easy to accept that position despite all of those scientific facts and charts and graphs. As marketers and salespeople, one of our primary goals is to get people to change their beliefs about things (in particular, about our brands). But changing minds isn't an easy process; in fact, research has shown that you're 25 times more likely to get someone's help if you ask them as opposed to asking for permission first.

Our Comforts Impact our Decision Making

Even after someone has made a commitment to follow through on something, it’s all too easy for them to lose their resolve when they’re presented with anything that might interfere with making good on their promise. If we feel tempted by the idea of taking a different route, then we might convince ourselves that our original goal wasn’t important enough—or that achieving it doesn’t matter. Again, though, if you can anticipate possible obstacles ahead of time and have strategies in place to deal with them effectively and efficiently, then your chances of maintaining commitment increase dramatically. And having contingency plans prepared is easier than ever before thanks to innovations like cloud computing and virtual assistants.

Complexity and Lack of Vision Cause Doubt

One thing I’ve learned as a recruiter is that when someone loses their commitment, they usually lose it over something very small. For example, if you were to ask a person why they left their old job, often times it comes down to one tiny decision by a manager (or lack of attention to detail on that manager’s part). When people are hit with things like complex systems or bureaucracy at work (or lack of vision for growth), we often start feeling overwhelmed by our job situation and second-guess what brought us into that role in the first place. Lack of clarity around direction causes doubt. Doubt leads to lost commitment.

The Selfish Brain Keeps Us Stuck in Bad Relationships

In short, it’s all about your brain. Sure, there are a number of complex psychological and biological mechanisms at play in relationships, but it all starts with our brains. The more we learn about how our brains work—particularly when it comes to love and romance—the better able we’ll be to create healthy and lasting relationships. This is especially true when it comes to early courtship: If you want commitment out of your romantic partner, you must make your brain work for you rather than against you.

Bad Relationships Reduce Resilience

Close relationships are essential to well-being and resilience, but they can also negatively impact our ability to bounce back from adversity. Our close relationships tend to change and evolve over time. The new stages of a relationship feel great because you are able to spend time with your partner on a regular basis, get to know one another better, fall in love, etc. However, as a relationship becomes more routine or predictable in daily life (referred to as attachment security), negative aspects like lack of satisfaction or feeling lonely may arise. Studies have shown that when we are focused on trying to fix these issues it actually makes it harder for us to cope when things go wrong; if we don’t allow ourselves time out we become less resilient when times get tough.

Misunderstandings Lead to Miscommunication

It’s been said that relationships are difficult because we speak different love languages. Communication problems caused by misunderstandings might mean you begin to feel like your partner doesn’t care about you, or don’t value your time and effort. The good news is that these feelings can be easily avoided with a little proactive work on both sides. Don’t wait for conflicts to arise—instead, make an effort to discuss expectations early on in your relationship and clarify what it means to show commitment in your eyes.